How do I stop overthinking and procrastinating?
Get to a next best step once you realize you are overthinking and procrastinating. Overthinking often breeds inaction. It’s a key maintaining factor in the process of procrastination. Here’s a personal example. I’ve been overthinking this blog post for 3 to 6 weeks. On the one hand, I’ve got ideas, but on the other, it just didn’t feel right. Maybe I hadn’t “figured it out.” Maybe something else. Regardless, I was stuck and procrastinating.
Like, I’m capable of forming coherent thoughts at times, but on the other hand, I haven’t written one down…
What angle do I want to take? What’s the purpose? Will this or that be the most impactful? What is the the best approach?
Pause.
Overthinking may present itself in a couple of ways, but the behavioral pattern of thinking (and thinking and thinking) without action is present in many mental health disorders, and just at a basic human level. It’s a common cognitive response to anxiety and a method of trying to control an experience that often leads to good old-fashioned procrastination. Overthinking, especially when it leads to difficulty with planning, organization, and task completion, can also be a sign of executive dysfunction. ADHD and anxiety are commonly linked to executive dysfunction– our brains just don’t do what we’d like them to all the time.
Why do I get stuck overthinking?
Overthinking is self-reinforcing while not actually helping you move forward.Why is it so easy to get stuck in the pattern of overthinking and procrastinating? It’s likely because the pattern reinforces itself. It feels good to overthink at times (e.g., “I’m almost there, I’ve almost cracked the code, if I can just think a little more”), or maybe it feels just less bad (e.g., “I’m scared of BLANK consequence, but maybe I can figure out a way around”), and sometimes less bad is enough to reinforce it. For me, overthinking feels like “I’m making progress,” which reinforces it positively, but also keeps me from having to do the thing that is stressful about writing: actually writing.
Try this to stop overthinking.
If you even think you might be overthinking, take a brief pause. 90 seconds.
Use a present-moment-focused skill (being in the present moment) like a breathing exercise for 90 seconds, and just try to be for that period.
There are other options here, of course, but this is my favorite first step in many cases. For others, it may be 90 seconds of gentle physical movement, 90 seconds of sunshine, 90 seconds with a cold compress on your head. Work with your therapist to identify what works as a pause for you.
Next, decide if you need one or two more rounds of a present-moment skill, or, if you’re ready, try one action.
Take an action; aka, what’s a next step?
Identify something that would be a next best step. “Next best” here means something you’ll probably have to do anyway, even if it’s not the perfect next step. Just a next action that may help. Devote 5 minutes to DOING it. It doesn’t have to be perfect, it just has to be.
After this, devote another 5, or if you’re feeling it, 10 minutes to either this or another next best step. Once you need a break, take a brief 3 to 10 minute one, then try another 5 minutes.
If you need a longer break, take something that most would call a reasonable break, but commit to what time you’ll get re-started.
A real-life example:
My favorite intervention with creative types who are stuck in writer’s block, for example, is: “Write a BLANK Story.” For perfectionists, it’s often “Write a BAD Story.” For a Mr. or Ms. Smarty-pants Perfectionism, it’s “Write a DUMB Story.” Write a quick stream-of-consciousness story. The only point is to actually WRITE SOMETHING. Engage in the behavior. That’s a next best step.
Get it done. We will do this with our clients in session (called body doubling), or we’ll do it separately and trade next week if that’s helpful. The story doesn’t have to be long, but let’s agree to writing something that is a meaningful word count for that person.
Once you’ve done it, don’t focus on the product. Try to hold the end product lightly and find appreciation for the action you took. What was it like to write? What was it like to write without caring about the product? Can we try it again next week, but as “Write a story you only kind of like with a beginning, a middle, and an end?”
Overthinking is common and easy for all of us to get stuck in. Try a next best step once you can accept that you may not think your way out of the problem.